Tips for the First Meeting Between Your Toddler and Baby

June 11, 2018

first meeting between toddler and baby, help your toddler become a great older sibling, toddler and new baby tips

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Last week, I shared my tips for preparing a toddler for a new baby. It was all about getting your firstborn mentally ready for your new family member well in advance. Now, imagine that your baby has arrived and it’s time to introduce your toddler to their younger sibling. The first meeting between your toddler and the new baby is significant because it will set the tone for their relationship. I’m not saying you’re doomed if they get off to a rocky start, but it is discouraging (and heartbreaking) if it doesn’t go well.

Set the Stage

You want the first meeting to be calm and free of distractions. Try to make sure that no one is present aside from your nuclear family and maybe invite a quiet photographer (like grandma) to capture the memories.

Your child has probably never seen a brand new baby so be ready to answer questions and explain the baby’s behavior. Some toddlers will wonder aloud what every movement and sound mean and others will quietly observe.

Meeting at Home

It would be ideal to have their first meeting at home because toddlers like to be in their normal, comfortable environment. If you’re home, you don’t have to worry as much about them becoming too overwhelmed because everything around them is familiar. The only thing different would be the baby.

We originally were going to bring Goose to the hospital for our kids’ first meeting because we weren’t sure how long we’d be there. I ended up being discharged way sooner than expected so we decided to let the girls meet when we got home. I was so grateful that it worked out this way!

My mom was already at our house watching Goose so she stayed and took pictures. We set our phones aside and no one else was there to interrupt the special moment. Goose was ecstatic to see and hold Belly and all of us were very relaxed and happy. It could not have been more perfect!

If the timing works for you, I definitely recommend postponing the first meeting until you’re home.

Meeting at the Hospital

Of course, there are circumstances when you’re not able to go home right away. If you have your toddler visit you at the hospital, just make sure they know what to anticipate. Not only might it be distracting to see nurses and doctors coming and going, but it can be uncomfortable for a young child to see their mom in a medical setting. Set some expectations for your toddler before they arrive, especially if they’ve never been to a hospital, so they’re not in total shock.

When your toddler enters the room, try not to have the baby in your arms yet. This way you can give your toddler hugs and a moment of undivided attention after being apart. Once your toddler seems acclimated, bring the baby over and introduce them to each other.

Low Pressure

If your toddler initially has no interest in the baby, don’t force it. Typically with toddlers, the more you insist, the more they resist. Keep talking about how excited the baby is to have an awesome older sibling and give your toddler time to absorb this huge change.

I’ve also known people who have a gift “from the baby” for the older sibling, like a puzzle or book. I did not do this with my kids, but it could be a sweet gesture if you think your toddler needs a little more coaxing.

The main goal is to make their first meeting positive and celebratory. It may only be a few minutes, but the impressions are lasting.

What else have you done to make sure the first meeting between your kids went smoothly?

Once you’ve brought baby home, see some great ways to foster a positive sibling relationship and grow a healthy bond between your kids!

Here are some fun ways to play with baby throughout the first year and see how to get Dad involved in baby’s life!

Talk to you soon!

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